Should You Stay or Go? (Your Job + Anything Else In Life) Ep 46
Jan 18, 2024
Annabelle Matson
Welcome to the first episode of the new year, inside this episode I’m discussing the natural inclination to reassess our career paths at this time of the year.
Should you stick out your current role (or situation) or make a leap of faith into something new?
We’re discussing how to move through a decision making process about whether your current job aligns with your goals and wellbeing.
This same rationale also applies to decision making about anything in life!
Here are some takeaways:
If you’re thinking of leaving, how to make empowered job decisions and the role mindset and self belief plays in this
Cultivating an abundant mindset to open doors to new opportunities in life and work
Discovering the hidden gifts within challenging work relationships and how these situations can be opportunities
Leaving Versus Changing: We explore the idea that sometimes the solution isn't necessarily leaving a job but rather changing how we interact with our roles and work environments. This shift in perspective can lead to a more fulfilling experience without the need for a drastic change.
Creating a healthier relationship with work and creating stronger work boundaries
Welcome to the first episode of the new year, inside this episode I’m discussing the natural inclination to reassess our career paths at this time of the year.
Should you stick out your current role (or situation) or make a leap of faith into something new?
We’re discussing how to move through a decision making process about whether your current job aligns with your goals and wellbeing.
This same rationale also applies to decision making about anything in life!
Here are some takeaways:
If you’re thinking of leaving, how to make empowered job decisions and the role mindset and self belief plays in this
Cultivating an abundant mindset to open doors to new opportunities in life and work
Discovering the hidden gifts within challenging work relationships and how these situations can be opportunities
Leaving Versus Changing: We explore the idea that sometimes the solution isn't necessarily leaving a job but rather changing how we interact with our roles and work environments. This shift in perspective can lead to a more fulfilling experience without the need for a drastic change.
Creating a healthier relationship with work and creating stronger work boundaries
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Share this episode with a friend who may enjoy it too.
Speaker 1:
Hi, it's Annabel Matzin and welcome to the Steep your Soul podcast. Soulful guidance for women who are seeking deeper truth and meaning to their lives. If you're ready to move past what's been holding you back and awaken to your full potential and purpose in life, then let's get started. Hello, it's Annabel Matzin here. Welcome back to the podcast.
Speaker 1:
This is my first episode for the new year, so it's great to be here recording this with you, and I'm recording this early in the morning, actually before my wee girl wakes up. Sometimes I do just a little bit of work before she gets up in the morning. I truly would have been horrified to do this prior to having kids, but it's funny how the way that you work changes based on the season of life that you're in. It's not something that feels like a drag or like a hustly. It actually just feels really lovely to be able to get up slightly earlier, do a little bit of work and then be able to spend my day with her and know that I've got the things done that I wanted to get done. So here we are, recording a new episode for the new year, and this one is all about should you stay or should you go, because it's that time of year where we can begin to reflect and question our current path, question the way things are and it's not uncommon, I think, to come back from a break I'm sure you found this and question things you know specifically is this job right for me? Or we can begin to question other things in our life as well. So if you're in this boat questioning should I stay or should I go, I want to share a few thoughts with you on this episode that will hopefully help guide your decision making around this, because I think sometimes we need to leave a job because, without growing it, we might be ready for a new challenge, or it might have actually become unhealthy for us or toxic for us in some way. So we need to move on, and that's the most self honouring and loving thing that we can do for ourselves.
Speaker 1:
Sometimes the answer isn't to leave, but rather about changing the way that we're interacting with the role, with the work environment. So there's a lot of power in this, which I'll talk about soon. Knowing that, you know, often we're thinking like I can't feel better in this job because of this person, because of this situation, and I know it's not going to change. So therefore I'm really stuck. But there's actually a lot of power in realising and understanding that it's not always about the role that needs to change. It's actually about how we're interacting with the role and making those changes within ourselves. And then the role, the situation, the difficult colleague can actually stay the same, but our experience of the job or the role, the work, completely changes and there's so much freedom in that and realising that we have the power to be able to do that. So let's kind of talk a little bit about this and we'll break it down a little bit further.
Speaker 1:
Before I jump into that, I want to let you know that Elevate, my mastermind program, is open for enrolment again, which is really exciting. I'm really excited to bring together another intimate group for our late Feb, early March intake. So if you're interested in checking that out, I'll leave a link to that below. This is a six month program with me. It's for professional women leaders, business owners who are ready to create a venex level of success in a new way, with deeper self belief and a calm and settled nervous system. So it's a place to be if you want to achieve more of the things that you want in your work life but you want to do it in a way that leaves your body feeling light and relaxed. You want to reach new goals that feel soft and present and at ease when you do that, if you want to get clear on what's next or be able to be supported to make a change in your work life. This is so much of what we do in the mastermind, so I'll leave a link to the mastermind below if you would like to check that out, and there's also some special bonuses on offer if you would like to join us in the month of January.
Speaker 1:
Ok, so let's talk about leaving. If you're leaning towards leaving, leaving is all about a mindset and believing that there are more opportunities. This is so key because if we're leading with thoughts like it's going to be really hard to find something new, or there's nothing out there that I want, you're going to literally take action, or no action, as the case may be that will confirm that as a truth. So all of our actions and our results stem from a belief or a thought that we've been thinking. If I'm thinking thoughts like, ok, there's not, there's not really any great jobs out there for me, or it's going to be really hard to find something new. That's the thought that I'm thinking. That's going to make me feel pretty despondent about the whole process. When I feel that way, I'm really unlikely to take actions that are going to support that outcome that I'm wanting to create, or finding a new job. I'm unlikely to put myself out there. It's probably going to be a real struggle to do things like update my CV or even chat to people about opportunities that I'm looking for.
Speaker 1:
So we'll end up really creating and confirming that as a truth, that there aren't any jobs out there, that it is difficult to find something. But, on the other hand, if you're thinking thoughts like there is a great opportunity out there for me, or I believe that there is something really good making its way to me, you're thinking that kind of thought and holding that as a belief. The feeling that that creates for you is you feel inspired, you feel energised, you feel hopeful, you feel open and ready, expecting, and when you feel that way, the actions that you take are really different, aren't they? You're much more likely to do things that are going to place you in situations where you will create that new, incredible opportunity. And not only that it opens and expands your energy field opens you up to be able to receive that opportunity into your life.
Speaker 1:
So it's so much about the thoughts that we're thinking and realising that we're always confirming something as truth. Whether it's a negative thought or a positive thought. We will always confirm that it's truth. We will create experiences in our life that confirm that original thought or belief to be true. So it's so much about having this abundant mindset and about yourself and about opportunities that are available to you. So be intentional also about how you're thinking about yourself and your skills.
Speaker 1:
So, more than anything that's written on paper, written on your CV, people feel your belief when they interact with you, and I find many of my clients attract incredible opportunities to them that really don't make sense on paper, like hasn't doesn't make sense that they've created this opportunity, because the logical brain would say that other people with more experience quote unquote should have got that. But they have been able to create these opportunities because of the belief that has radiated out of them and that people have been picking up on and feeling from them as well. So it's your dominant thoughts that create who you're being. So you know that feeling of being around someone who just trust themselves. They trust themselves in their skills. They're not puffed up, they're not trying to prove themselves in any way. There's just this calm, groundedness or certainty that they hold about themselves that's really magnetic.
Speaker 1:
You can create this, and it starts with being intentional about how you're thinking about yourself and your value and your skills and what you're offering. So start with a couple of belief statements or affirmations and write them down. Circle them through your mind throughout the day, as you're going about your work day, as you're driving to work, as you're at home, when you're in the shower, when you're getting ready in the morning. Think about a couple of affirmations or belief statements that really capture how you want to be feeling about yourself and your skills and bring them into your daily practice. Be intentional about using them and you've got to find it just completely changes how you feel about yourself and then the actions that you take as a result.
Speaker 1:
Okay, let's look at the other side of the equation here, which is staying. So, as I said earlier, sometimes the answer isn't always to leave, but to change the way that we're interacting with work. So we might be in a situation where there's like a difficult colleague or a difficult boss, or there's something about the work that we're finding really challenging. And it can be tempting to just write it off and say I need to leave and, as we talked about earlier, sometimes that is the right thing to do. But I think it's also important to not be really quick in making that decision and not take the time to reflect on what is it about this job or the situations? That's the situation that's triggering something in me, what's making this work environment challenging? And, importantly, what part am I playing in this? Not in a shamey, self blame kind of way, but with real kindness and gentleness, asking yourself, reflecting how are my thoughts about myself contributing to the way I feel about this challenge?
Speaker 1:
Because there's, whether you believe it or not, and it's hard to believe this when we're in it but difficult colleagues, difficult people that we come across in life and in work, they are a gift to us because they're touching a sore point in us. Otherwise it wouldn't, their behavior wouldn't impact us. But they're a gift in the way that they're really asking us or inviting us or guiding us to heal something within ourselves, and normally that's something to do with our self worth, how we feel about ourselves. So that difficult boss who you feel is like it's never enough for him or she sends you emails, you know, at a certain time in the night, challenging things that you're doing. Whatever it might be that that difficult person to deal with. While it's really hard dealing with them, often they are really inviting us to stand more deeply in our sense of self, our self worth, to believe more deeply in who we are and what we have to offer. That's the gift of them.
Speaker 1:
So I think it's really important to take some time to think about that, because the cool thing about that is we can often stay really stuck in a situation a work situation or a life situation when we believe that it has to be someone else that changes in order for us to feel better, to have a different experience. That's a really stuck place to operate from, because it's like us handing over all of our power to the other person, being like I'll wait for you to change and I can't feel good until you have, but there's real power and an immense amount of freedom, realizing that you can feel better. Now you can change and transform your experience of work by making those inner shifts, by changing the way that you're interacting with work. That's the amazing news, that's the good news, and I think that's also leads us into a conversation around work boundaries as well. So maybe that's part of what might need to shift to create a different experience of work for you, and practical action steps are going to be part of this. You will probably already know the action steps that you need to take to create better work boundaries for yourself.
Speaker 1:
It's probably going to look like something like getting away from work in good time, not checking your emails at night, having interests outside of work, things that really invite you into enjoying things outside of your working day, and all of those are great and important. But I always say that if we just look at that, the conversation around work life balance is incomplete, because so much about work boundaries. Work boundaries become so much easier to set and to honor the more belief we have in ourselves. So most of the time, the reason why work boundaries feel difficult to honor and stay committed to is because we're feeling in some way, like we have to work really, really hard to prove ourselves, and so if we're operating from that mindset and that belief system, it's going to be really difficult to continue to keep up those actions like not checking our emails, like getting away from work in good time. It's going to be hard to stay committed to those actions if we have an unconscious belief that's operating that doesn't align with that. So if we're operating from an unconscious belief, I need to prove myself. We will, just as we talked about earlier, we will take actions that really confirm that as a truth. So it's about looking at okay, if I want to get away from work in good time, if I want to have a healthier relationship with work, knowing that all of my actions are born out of a belief or thought, what belief do I really need to be sitting in that supports that action? And so it's so much more about how we're feeling about ourselves. Work boundaries are so much easier to set the more belief we have in ourselves and the less proving we feel we have to do. So I hope this has been helpful for you. If you know a friend or colleague who might benefit from this conversation that we've had today or anything on the podcast, I'd so appreciate if you could send this episode with them. That really helps expand the reach of the podcast and support and help more people. So go and also check out some of the other episodes on the podcast as well, have a look through the podcast feed and see what else is jumping out at you. Don't forget to subscribe to the podcast as well and join me in elevating the mastermind.
Speaker 1:
As I said, enrollment is open for our next round, which starts at the end of February. Places have started filling and I'm really excited to be bringing together another wonderful group. My mastermind program, elevate, is my intimate group coaching program for professional women leaders, business owners, to create the next level of success from deep self-belief and a calm nervous system. So you're going to learn how to create real certainty about your skills and expertise and expand your view of what's possible for you. You'll get clear on the path ahead and receive the support that you need to make it all possible, make any changes that you need to make to bring you more fulfillment and enjoyment from the work that you've got on, and I think there's just another way to be able to create the success that we want that brings more fulfillment and more enjoyment to our life, and it doesn't require burning ourselves out to a crisp or constantly overthinking or holding ourselves back in situations that don't serve us. We really believe in this program that calm, sustainable success is possible, and it really starts with cultivating deeper belief in ourselves, healing our nervous system and embracing a lighter way of working and that's a key concept for us in the mastermind. We're going to learn how to draw in opportunities and advance your career in an entirely new way.
Speaker 1:
So if you would love to be able to walk into a room to present or speak and feel grounded and peaceful, knowing that there's nothing that can shake your confidence, if you'd love to see new opportunities this year flow into your life, into your work, out of the blue, by not burning yourself out, actually doing less rather than more, if you'd love to get home at night and feel like your body is light and relaxed and that you've got the brain space to be able to connect with people that you love, this would be a great fit for you and being able to really witness yourself stepping into and reaching new goals in your work life, while feeling really soft and present and at ease. This is the place for you. So go and check out the link. If this is resonating with you, we would love to welcome you in.
Speaker 1:
All of the details are available on that link and if you join in the month of January, there's some beautiful bonuses on offer, which you'll see on that page as well, and I'm here. If you have any questions about how it works, whether it's right for you, don't hesitate to reach out and we can make a time to chat. So I hope this has been helpful for you. Please do share it with a friend. Make sure you subscribe to the podcast. Come and follow me on social media. You can find me at Annabel Mattson and I look forward to connecting again soon.