Steep Your Soul

Relaxed Woman: On Choosing Peace Ep 66

• Annabelle Matson

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Do you ever find yourself waiting for peace — telling yourself, “Once things calm down, once I’ve got more clarity, then I’ll finally feel settled”?


In this episode of Relaxed Woman, we’re exploring what it means to choose peace instead of waiting for it — and how peace can become an everyday practice, even when life still feels uncertain.



We’ll talk about:

  • Why waiting for life to be “sorted” before we feel peace keeps us stuck in frustration


  • How conflict in relationships can rob us of peace — and why choosing peace over being right creates more stability and joy


  • The “sliding doors” moments throughout the day where we can either nurture peace or chip away at it


  • Simple practices to calm the mind and interrupt spirals of overthinking


  • The deeper peace that steadies us beyond our circumstances


If you’ve been feeling pulled in a hundred directions, this episode will remind you that peace isn’t something you have to wait for — it’s something you can choose, one moment at a time.


✨ Resources mentioned:



Private Coaching - book in for an Initial Breakthrough Session or work with me in a 3 or 6 month program

Reclaim Your Calm $20 workshop

Visit my website

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Submit a question for an upcoming episode.

Welcome to Relaxed Women, a nourishing series here on the podcast to help you slow down, soften your grip, and live from a place of deeper peace and trust. These episodes are here to remind you that you don't have to hold it all together. You can breathe, release the weight you've been carrying, and find a different way of living. So if you're tired from caring at all, you are in the right place. Let's take a deep breath together and let's begin. So I wanna talk to you in this episode today about choosing peace rather than waiting for it. There is so much that can pull us away from experiencing peace in our lives. There are always unknowns about the future. There's worries about work or money, maybe health concerns, relationship uncertainties, and all of the challenges wrapped up in these areas. They're real and they're valid. But I've noticed in my own life I can slip into waiting for peace to arrive. So once these areas are sorted, once I finally have clarity, then I'll be able to relax and then I can enjoy life more. The thing is, there's never really a time when we've got it all sorted. One thing gets resolved and then another challenge tends to appear. Have you found that in your life? I've heard it described like life being described as like walking through the mist. Every so often, the mist lifts and you see clearly in front of you, and for a moment everything makes sense and then the mist rolls back in. So if you are waiting on peace, there will always be something that pulls us away from it. True peace is not circumstantial. It's something that we choose even when there are still uncertainties and things that we don't know about in the future, even when life isn't perfect. So peace isn't only about big, dramatic moments. It's found in small, ordinary ones, and there are so many, like what I would call like sliding door moments in a day where we can choose peace or not. It can be in the tone that we choose to use with people and the thoughts we allow ourselves to dwell on. And like, do I scroll on my phone in this little pocket of time or do I breathe deeply instead and allow the sun to fall on my face? Do I feel annoyed at my toddler for an interrupting me for the 100th time when I just wanna get this one task done? Or do I take a deep breath and remind myself that being a mom is actually a real, real gift? Do I check my emails late at night just to see if I've got a response around that or. Do I give myself permission to disconnect and rest? There's plenty of times when I do the absolute opposite of what I've been mentioning here, so I don't think it's about being perfect. But I think it's about putting peace back on your radar and reminding ourselves that we can choose peace. It's not a circumstantial piece that you wait for when everything is worked out, but a piece that you choose to actively create in your own life through micro choices, through those everyday sliding door moments that are always available to us. One of the biggest areas where our piece can be challenged is in relationships. So for example, when my husband Ben and I first met, I hadn't yet learn healthy conflict resolution. So 14 years ago, my default was silent treatment, and I would stonewall him. So what started out as like something reasonably small, a small frustration or hurt became a much bigger deal after hours of silence, and it robbed me of a lot of peace. Over the years, I've realized that I value peace in my home more than I value being right. Sometimes that means I have to swallow my price and I have to admit when I'm wrong or be the first to apologize and I'm stubborn. So that is not easy for me. But I'd rather do that than spend hours or days, intention and frustration, and for there to be a heaviness that sits over at home. So I wonder if there's an area in your life where you could apply the same thinking. I don't need to be right here. I choose to value peace instead. Sometimes that looks like letting go of the need for people to see things from our perspective. Sometimes it means forgiving people, people who don't seem to deserve it, but you do it because it frees you holding onto grudges and anger and low grade resentment. It doesn't give us peace. It keeps us trapped. Humbling ourselves and choosing peace isn't weakness. It's not about giving into people. It's actually a posture of strength because when we are in peace, we feel grounded. When we're in peace, we are so much more emotionally stable. That is a strong place to operate from, to approach life from, and I think being in peace just creates space for more lightness and joy. Sometimes the biggest things that take away from our piece aren't actually external at all. They're internal and it's our own worries and fears and doubts. When I catch myself spiraling into overthinking about something, I'll sometimes say out loud, I'm choosing not to think that today, and that might. Sound really simple, but sometimes that's all it takes to interrupt the spiral and put ourselves back onto a better path of thinking. And if that resonates, I've created a workshop called Reclaim Your Calm. It's$20 and it's packed with a whole lot of tools and practices that you can use in moments like this. When those anxious or worrisome thoughts come up, you can u use the tools and practices in that workshop to quieten your mind and adjust your thinking to thoughts that are a lot more peaceful, and you can find the link to that below. There are lots of ways that we can nurture peace, like calming our nervous system and choosing our thoughts and creating space in our day. But I've found there's also a deeper kind of peace, one that we can't actually manufacture on our own, and it's a piece that doesn't always make sense given what we are facing. It's a supernatural peace and it's the kind of peace that only God can give. So if you've listened to the episodes I did with Eve Northcutt, uh, which have sort of come before these episodes where she shared her story of being diagnosed with an incurable stage four cancer and then going on to receive two clear scans, cancer gone from her body. You might remember this. One of the biggest things people would say to me after listening to these episodes was how much peace and joy Eve carried. Even while she was facing something so enormous, she talked about things that she chose to do to lean into peace, but ultimately she was receiving a higher peace through her faith. And I know in my own life there have been seasons where from the outside things should not have felt peaceful at all, and yet somehow that they did. And that's the supernatural peace that scripture talks about. It's a peace that surpasses understanding and it steadies us in the middle of our storms in life. So prayer is one of those ways that we can access this kind of peace, and it's more than speaking our worries out loud. When we pray, something happens. It's like we hand our struggles and fears to God, and he lifts the weight from us, and heaven moves on our behalf. And you don't have to do all of this on your own. It's not about trying harder to find peace. It's about opening your hands. It's letting go, and I've found that God meets me in that place, giving me peace that I can't create on my own. And if you're listening and wondering what it might look like to ex begin exploring faith for yourself, I'll share a simple resource at the end of this episode that can help you. So peace doesn't arrive when life is perfect. It begins in the choices that we make moment by moment. So before we close, I want to pause with you for a moment and invite you to take a really deep breath in, really big and full from the belly. So breathe in. And as you exhale, I want you to imagine releasing whatever's been pulling you away from peace today. And take another really big, deep breath in, and again, giving yourself permission just to release the weight of those things that you've been holding onto. Sometimes it's that simple. It's one breath, it's one moment, one choice to soften. That brings us back to peace. So let me leave you with a question. What is pulling you away from peace right now? And it's not about judging yourself, it's just about awareness. How might I be contributing? To my lack of peace. And what's one thing you can do today to experience more peace? Maybe the answer might be found in some of the other episodes that are coming up in this relaxed women's series. So thank you for being here for this episode of Relaxed Women. There are more episodes waiting for you in this series, and there are more to come. So if that sounds like something you need, make sure you hit follow or subscribe so you don't miss what's ahead. And if a friend comes to mind who would love this too, please share an episode with them. And if today's episode spoke to you, you'll love the Reclaim Your Calm Workshop. It's$20, and it gives you simple ways to quieten your mind, feel more grounded, and bring more peace into your everyday life. You'll find the link for that in the show notes. And if you're listening today and curious about faith, maybe this idea of God's peace has stirred something in you. I've put together a free guide called Getting Started With Faith, and this won't be for everyone, but if you are wondering what it might look like to begin exploring Faith, this guide will walk you through it gently. And it also speaks to some of the questions and the barriers that I had when I was exploring this for myself too. You'll find the link for that in the show notes or the description of this episode. And if you feel ready to go even deeper, you can also learn more about working with me one-to-one in private coaching using the link below as well. So I look forward to being with you in another episode and take care until then.